Wif great suprise, 1998's Most Unimproved Drinker was Sean Hoerter. He came into 1998, wif a tolerance of Likker almost unmatched, cuss it all t' tarnation. Jest about ev'ry weekend until Senio' Week Sean got ripped, cuss it all t' tarnation. It all started out at mostimo's bash when th' Madness was unleashed, cuss it all t' tarnation. He drank so much thet night he was still buzzin' th' next mo'nin' in Church wif Lan'on, as enny fool kin plainly see. When senio' week rolled aroun' ev'ryone thunk Sean'd stay ripped at th' betch. But wif a great suprise he was th' DD almost ev'ry night. Mahrtle Betch nevah gotta see th' Madness. No thets a fuckin' shame. As th' summer went on he slowly drank less an' less. Then th' af'er th' Ruffin accident, ah thunk Likker was outta his vocab. Well bust mah britches an' call me streaker. Sean began t'six pack agin in late Nov., but his tolerance was gone. He warn't th' man he used t'be. In cornclushun, as 1998 progressed Sean gave up th' bottle an' as sad as it is, 1998's Most Unimproved Drinker Award goes t'Sean Hoerter.

Ya know, yeah th' Madness might haf been tamed in '98. ah might haf been a pussy Senio' week. Shet mah mouth! But ah's back god dadburnit! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide! 1999, Sprin' Bust, Senio' Week, Cruise: two wo'ds sum it all up, OOOOOOOOOOH YEAH. This hyar is mah craziess year yet, ah came into '99 drunk an' god dadburnit i'm gwine out drunk. Shet mah mouth! Nevah fear th' Madness will be an Alcohalic agin befo'e '99 is on over. All yo' fuckin' geeks like John-Boy Bowman better watch th' fuck out. oooooooh yeah